after midnight

Πήγα πενταήμερη και γύρισα.

Χτες βράδυ κοιμήθηκα στο κρεβάτι μου (σ'ένα μέρος που δεν ήταν πούλμαν), χωρίς κανέναν να κοιμάται πάνω μου (χωρίς να κοιμάμαι πάνω σε κανέναν). Χωρίς καθόλου θόρυβο. Ήταν περίεργο.

Συνηθίζεις τόσο εύκολα σε κάποια πράγματα. Πέντε μέρες και συνήθισα τα τραπέζια του πρωινού και τις πεταμένες κάλτσες της Α. και την Β. να παίρνει τηλέφωνο τους δικούς της και οι θόρυβοι (τα γέλια και οι φωνές και τα σκυλάδικα και τα βήματα στο διάδρομο) έγιναν ρουτίνα. Συνήθισα τον Β. που χτύπαγε κάθε τρεις και λίγο την πόρτα και συνήθισα μέχρι και να βγαίνω να του φωνάζω "σε βάρκα γεννήθηκες;" κάθε φορά που δεν έκλεινε βγαίνοντας.

Τώρα ψιλονυστάζω και προσπαθώ να βρω τι θα γράψω, αλλά κάνω χάζι τα στάτους και τα κόμμεντ στο φεισμπουκ και γελάω μόνη μου με τις φωτογραφίες σα χαζή. Αποσυντονίζομαι τελείως, αυτό το ποστ όσο πάει και καταστρέφεται.

Ρε γαμώτο, γιατί να είναι μόνο μία η πενθήμερη?

Έρχονται Χριστούγεννα και θα πάμε πενταήμερη* και ο κόσμος είναι ωραίος ξανάααα








(*για μένα θα είναι πάντα πενταήμερη και όχι πενθήμερη. όπως ΣΤΙΣ μία η ώρα.)

songs for autumn evenings #3

Face it: this is something I'm doing for the whole of October.

songs for autumn evenings #2

songs for autumn evenings #1

(This was supposed to be posted yesterday. Clearly it wasn't.)

I just... have too many feelings about this song.

Once upon a time... from Capucha on Vimeo.

This is my favourite little french girl in the world.

10.27

I looked through one of my sketchbooks yesterday. I had noted somewhere:

"I wonder how people think. Literally how. What do thoughts look like? Do all people think in pictures like I do?"

A few days ago it occured to me:

What do people think about?

I think too much about fictional characters and their relationships. Spend time making up characters and stories, and then spend time cursing myself for not working seriously on them. Make up crazy what-if scenarios, thinking about what could happen today or tomorrow or the day after.

Also I spend time worrying about how nobody likes me and how I should put my foot in my mouth sometimes and how people might be avoiding me. Then, I think about how ridiculous that is.

I'm ridiculous a lot of the time.

I also think about: the weather, what I should wear, when I'm going to get my hair cut. Cats and food and sleepiness. Fears. If I'm hungry, if I'm tired (I'm almost always tired or hungry). Schoolwork. Things that happened. Things I want to happen. People on the internet, people in my life. Myself: Am I good enough? Am I going to fail? Do I want to be who I am? Will I achieve what I want? Then, soft beds and running water and rain. Or sun.



PS.: I promise there will be pretty pictures next time.
PPS.: I was thinking about starting to write in Greek. Maybe I will. I don't know.
PPPS.: What do you think about?

I'm back.

It's home.

I've got things to do.


(I've posted this song before. I don't care.)

Apparently, inspiring things.

Female student at Pratt Institute, Brooklyn, working with an oxy-acetylene cutter. Date unknown.
(Pratt Institute Libraries)

(Lily Elise, Edwardian actress)

(Bogota, Capital of Colombia)

(Fetish Fiesta, by toerning on deviantart)



(Zoe Saldana, actress)

(Please, if any of you knows the sources for the uncredited photographs, please tell me so I can credit them properly)

PS. I got a tumblr! My username is, surprisingly, Elviella. Tell me if you use it too, I'd love to find you there as well. C:

1.20

My thoughts run through my fingers when I write.
I feel them take shape and become coherent, become true. Their essence is in the words, and the essence of the words is in the writings.
I only really think, really concentrate when I write. The rest of the time my thoughts are endless chains running around my head.
I once read a book about a girl who wrote. That girl wrote because only then she could think. Reading that book, I realised how true that was for me as well.
When I write, and when I talk, is when I truly think. It's easier, much easier to concentrate on something serious then. And then the thoughts run through my fingers and onto the paper, or through my tongue and onto the air. I hear them, I read them, and they're crystal clear, existing and constant.
That's why I need to write. Now I know.

Oh, hi there, summer.

I didn't really see you coming.

Please, wait a little for me to get used to you. I need you and I don't want you to pass without realising your presence.

Welcome in my heart.

PS. I should seriously rethink my latest blogging choices and write something longer than, say, five lines. Yeah.

Sometimes I get annoyed.

There's no more to it.

Just, sometimes, I get annoyed.


[rather unrelated song that I absolutely love]

What I do.

Exams have been taking their toll on me. I remember the times in middle school, when it was all easy to study and take breaks like a normal person and sleep at a logical hour.

There are so many things I want to do instead of studying.

There are films I want to watch and comics I want to buy and stuff I feel like writing and paintings I want to paint and food to cook and places, places to be and walk and sunbathe in.

Instead, I'm at home. I plaid my hair. I open the fridge's door, I close it. I switch the computer on, I switch it off. I should study, and the internet is delicious. IshouldstudyIshouldstudyIshouldstudy.

I hear people talking about the exams - "I studied for one hour. Come on, what was there to study?" "I studied for two hours, but really did it all" "I was out with this person and that person, but then I studied and I was okay."

I studied for a whole day, and I took breaks every five minutes, and then I woke up in the middle of the night because I had a weird dream that involved Latin and Lost (yeah, the tv show and the subject I was supposed to study). My mom, forever the insomniac, was in the living room watching the bonus features in the Lost dvds. I studied for a bit because I had only read each text once and then slept and then my alarm clock didn't ring.

I am alive, but I feel like my breaths are not well spent.

There's always mustard in my sandwich.

My friend said on Friday that it was anti-diet day and I thought it was so cool! In general I'm anti-day anything, but a day against diets sounds most certainly awesome.

So Friday being the last day of school, we had a lot of spare time... and we went to eat!

As I frequently say to my mom, if my family has taught me anything for sure, it is the importance of enjoying my food.

My family is the awesomest.

Badass, people.

Hello people!

Yup yup, I know I've been neglecting this blog here, and you can only blame me... and the trips. and the studying. and manga, possibly.

Well, nothing big right now. I'm going to post this week about Prague shenanigans and Comic-con fangirlism, but for now, have this AMAZING thing:


Also apparently it is my BLOG BIRTHDAY TODAY? This is amazing, too. :D And what better thing to post on a birthday than a Badass Girl Manifesto! Hell to the yes, I say.

Aaaand I'm off.

...to

PRAGUE!

You guys, this is so amazing! TOO AMAZING FOR CAPS LOCK, EVEN.

I'll be back in Friday (with photos to share).

In the meantime, have some chocolate:

First Days of Spring

It's the first time I'm so excited about spring.

Usually it goes mostly unnoticed - at least, the anticipation goes unnoticed.
It's the first year I've longed for spring so much. Rather, it's the first time I've taken in all the signals that show its coming. I didn't long for it until it was actually here.
It's the first year that I'm looking fondly at each blossoming almond tree.

I'm bored, I don't want to study. I stare outside the windows.
The sun is one of my favourite things right now.
I want to go shopping and buy fresh short sleeved shirts.
I'm listening to sunny music again, I want to punctuate everything with exclamation marks.

I want to run and dance in every wide space I see.
I feel like sharing and smiling all the time.

...This post would be much more suitable for last week. Right now, it's only dark and windy. But I'm keeping my spirits high! :3

Now this is really great!

It might be old news to you, but I was excited to hear that the Grammy prize for Best Album went to Arcade Fire's the Suburbs.

So excited that I started to dance around, in fact.

I mean, I was leafing through a magazine and there was a section about celebrities or whatever, mentioning how Lady Gaga dressed in the event and saying that she got the Best Pop Album prize, but nor her nor any of the others "big names" got the Best Album because it went to an indie rock Canadian band... Arcade Fire.

GUYS, I CAN'T EVEN -- This band is my favourite the last few months and they have beautiful, brilliant music and this just made me so happy!

ksajfnkhsdf;jsadflkjdlfjks;lfja;ldjfd;asjf;sljdf



Now I will proceed to linking you some of my favourite songs by Arcade Fire. Just because.

Crown of Love
Wake Up
Neighbourhood #1 (Tunnels)
Une Annee Sans Lumiere
Ocean of Noise
(Antichrist Television Blues)
The Suburbs
Modern Man
City With No Children
Sprawl II (Mountains Beyond Mountains)

(Sometime I will need to stop tagging almost everything I write as "randomness")

That's how Sundays should be.

I love the sun.
I love the warmth and the light and the colour.
I like walking.
I love happy, old-fashioned music.
I like to talk and listen.
I love to look at paintings.
I love to think.

I love days like this.

(I also like reading people's blog posts and writing comments. Just thought you should know)

My Unpopular Opinions

( I saw this on Tumblr and I thought... why not? Since I don't have a Tumblr account... Here you go, Blogger.)

I can't really get why video games are supposed to be exciting. I always get bored.

I don't think happy endings are cheap or always bad - I just like them with a twist.

I haven't read any "classic" comics - DC, Marvel, etc. I'm not interested in super heroes - I started with Disney stories and then went directly to artsy, modern stuff.

I hate it when conversations turn pervy.

I also don't understand why sex is still a taboo, why thinking it is normal is either pervy or slutty and I don't have problems talking seriously about it.

I don't think communism = fascism. I strongly disagree.

I don't like painted nails. I have only recently started to think they're okay.

Dorky guys/girls are awesome.

I don't get why tomboyish/non-mainstream/nerdy girls shouldn't be attractive.

I try to think smoking doesn't make you cool... However, I can't resist believing that it does look so damn cool. (not a smoker, though)

FUCK YEAH WOMEN CAN SWEAR AS WELL.

(Also the suffragettes were awesome.)

Dead languages are also awesome.

(Feel free to do this yourself, it's great)

'Tis a quick post

Family Man - a webcomic by Dylan Meconis

This thing. Read it. Read iiiiit. It's one of my favourite webcomics! Very nice art, lovely dialogue, and it's oh-so-very-dorky. (I mean, it's about a 18th century university and a dorky guy and an awesome librarian lady and it has mystery!) God, my love for all things dorky.

Also Dylan Meconis is seriously brilliant.

(Yes. I will eventually make a post that doesn't have to do with comics and/or my enormous dorkiness and be highly poetic and touching. Yeah. Eventually.)

TO-DO LIST!

-Catch up in reading every blog followed! D: (I've been neglecting that... a lot)

-Reply to all comments and thank people following and COMMUNICATE, DAMMIT.

-Post more! D:

-Get some sleep and work out more!

Love, Elv.

(First school week of 2011, Monday to Friday. Oh yeah.)

Everything is going to be fine.

I really do believe that.

Sincerely.

Not in a flamboyantly optimistic sort of way.

In a honest way.

I am mostly an optimist (and quite an idealist), but it hasn't got to do with it.

It has to do with the mere fact that things change.

No matter what you do, they change.

No matter how fucked up you think everything is.

No matter the fact you can't find a solution to the equation.

No matter how weird you think everything is.

Things will change. It will be different.

And in one or more ways, it's gonna be better.

Even if you know you haven't done well in an exam, you still are relieved. You wrote, it's over.

Even when you lose a friend, you feel better - no more pressure; maybe a strong bond with someone else.

And sometimes, it's just plain fine!

I honestly believe it when I say it, even if I can't see light at the moment, that everything is going to be fine.

Because it's going to be different. And you can see the good side of things. Or things will be good by themselves.

And goodness, just because!

PS. This is dedicated to A. You are stupid and awesome and very lovable.
PPS. My way to say "Happy New Year!!", I guess? May it be a awesome one!
PPPS. Blogger is stupid for not allowing exclamation marks in tags.
PPPPS. Cards are sent! I hope they don't arrive too late, but you know how the post is.
PPPPPS. My love of the day is exclamation marks, really!
PPPPPPS. I was reading someone's tumblr page and I saw this: "That awkward moment when you feel an actual physical ache in your chest because of the romance of two fictional characters. " Oh goodness. Story of my life. If you can relate, be nerdy with me about it! I'd love to hear.